Friday, August 12, 2016

On My Mind, Day 5: What to Wear

A few months ago, I completed a huge purge of my closets. I went through and got rid of any clothes I hadn't worn in the past few years and anything that just didn't fit right, whether it was too large or too small. And I took all of my business suits and donated them to a charity called Dress for Success, which helps outfit women for job interviews. I felt pretty good after that process, but with two closets (one here in Ohio and one in Michigan) it still feels like I have too much stuff.

Although I have been fairly conservative with my spending since I left my corporate job, I have managed to acquire some nice new items as well, especially from working at Anthropologie. And yet, I looked in my closet today and realized that I don't really wear most of the clothes in there. I like my wardrobe, but since I work at home now, it really doesn't suit my current lifestyle. There are some days where I stay in my pajamas writing until 3:30 or 4:00 and then I hop in the shower and change before Mark Johnson gets home from work.

And even when I change my clothes, it is usually into a loose fitting cotton sundress or yoga pants and a tank top. The weather hasn't helped matters either. I can barely stand the thought of pouring myself into one of my cute pairs of denim capris. It is just so hot out. And the humidity is even more oppressive than the heat. Today, I opened the balcony door for about five seconds, took one breath of the soupy air and closed it right back up again.

I miss walking around outside. And I miss the feeling of fresh, crisp air on my skin. I think my body needs to get more exercise. I have noticed that even my yoga pants are starting to feel pretty constricting. Usually summer is a really healthy time for me. I eat lots of fresh fruits and salads and I am out walking almost every night. But this summer has been a little different than usual. I have been stuck indoors a lot the past few weeks. And I have skipping out on my evening walks because of the heat.

So, maybe today's topic is really just a textbook woman's dilemma about what to eat, how much to exercise and what to wear. Or maybe there's a little more to it than that. I used to love shopping. And I guess I still do. But now that my income comes to me in hourly increments through my writing, it seems like everything I think about buying has an hourly rate attached. 

If I spend $60 at the grocery store, I think of the equivalent of hours I had to work to buy those groceries. If I want to buy some new comfy tank tops and sweatpants for my work at home days, I think about whether or not I will "break even" on the day if I spend more than I earned. I never thought that way when I was on a salary, even if it was ultimately based on an hourly rate. I guess I am still adjusting to this new life, in more ways than one. 

And sometimes I wonder if I really need any of these things, or if I just want to go for a nice long walk in the park. 

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